Twenty weeks ago, I made a commitment to start blogging every week. Some weeks, my words have been flowing effortlessly. Some weeks (like this one), I have struggled to finish a post before midnight. Some weeks, I have considered giving it up altogether. But every single Wednesday for almost half a year, I have posted something.
I am quite sure I would never have done this without making a public commitment. I keep showing up because I said I would do this, even if I am the only one who gives a damn about whether or not there is a new article every Wednesday. And I am so happy I didn’t give it up, because I am learning something every week. I am learning to put this kind of thoughts into words. I am learning to let go of perfectionism. I am learning to finish things. I am learning to listen.
But something is missing. Here I am, writing a blog on following your creative dreams, while losing track of my own. I want to tell more stories, other stories, stories that belong on a bookshelf rather than a blog. I want to start building the worlds and characters and scenes that are still just thin shadows lurking behind my back, waiting to be written to life.
That is why I have decided to do NaNoWriMo, a yearly international project where participants challenge themselves to write a novel draft of 50,000 words in November. I did it for the first time last year, and finished the last scene of my first more or less coherent novel draft with a few hours to spare on the 30th. I have never written so much on a single writing project before, and it only took a month.
Somewhere in between the stress and uncertainty of the months that followed, I gave up my plan to edit that draft into something readable. Throughout the year, I have written a few short stories and silly poems, but it feels like I lost the part of myself that loved writing unconditionally many years ago. At the same time, I know that if I just allow myself to actually write again, like I did last November, I can fall in love with writing again.
So here it is, a public commitment to write 50,000 words in November. Will anyone join me for the challenge? Let me know in the comments below!